24.12.08

On Christmas Eve Taxi Drivers

Dear Drivers,

Just because it's Christmas doesn't mean you may dictate how much you charge your passengers. Gasoline is at its all time low for the last 10 years for sanity's sake! Isn't that enough compensation for the holidays? An additional 30Php is not right, and a 150Php fare for a 90Php journey is worse. Besides, you'll be getting a lot of passengers throughout the day wherever you go due to the Christmas rush.

Also, I must remind you that not only is this illegal, but choosing passengers is unlawful as well. Too bad our law enforcers don't do anything about it.

tl;dr: Fuck you, choosy drivers.

Sincerely,

Disgruntled passenger,
Inggo

21.12.08

On Street Children Parents

Dear Parents,

I know it's really none of my business when you decide to fuck each other. However, I have been recently bothered by a few of your children, one dirtily sprawling around at our street, then suddenly touching me and asking for the ice cream cone I was eating. No, I will not give your child my ice cream cone. What irritates me the most is that the sucker was more persistent than the wart I've had for the last couple of years on my left hand.

I don't blame him, though. I blame you. If you cannot teach your children proper public manners, and do not have time to keep them from bothering other people, do not create more of them. It's like you people are child factories. Use protection if you cannot control your urges, and if you can't afford protection, do not copulate at all.

tl;dr: Keep your children away from me, and stop making more of them.

Sincerely,

Irritated Passerby,
Inggo

16.12.08

On MRT3/LRT1 Grammar

Dear Metrostar,

I have two corrections for you to make, first on your MRT3 "tips":

"Tips" is a plural word. "Isang" is "one" in Filipino. You cannot use "isang" to precede "tips". The correct sentence to use "narito ang isang tip".

Next, on your warning label at the emergency button on LRT1:

The Filipino of "button" is "pindutan", since it seems you're having trouble translating it. Also, although you "push" a "button", you do not "tulak" it. You "pindot" a "button".

Please correct these mistakes so that it wouldn't seem like Filipino is an uneducated race, even though it really is one.

Sincerely,

Grammar Nazi,
Inggo

P.S.
"Floor" is spelled with two O's, not three. It's nice that you're conserving the same pieces of paper for over a year now.

15.12.08

On Ungentlemanly Assholes

Dear Asshole,

You do not talk about women like that, treat women like that, especially when they're around even if it seems like it's okay with them. Even though I'm not one, I know it's never okay with them. You only degrade women if you can accept its aftereffects, one being you won't be able to be with one romantically. Yet, you still rant that you're not getting any. Of course you won't be getting any with the way you talk.

And even if one is not around, you still don't act that way if one is represented, i.e. someone's girlfriend or spouse is in the premises. Even though I'm not the direct representative of that particular woman, I know it still hurts them, being a representative myself of a different one. If your words were directed to mine, I would seriously punch you in the face. Leave that kind of talk when you're with an all-stag crowd of the same gender.

tl;dr: You're never getting laid, except maybe by gays.

Sincerely,

Refined Gentleman,
Inggo

14.12.08

On Late-Night Karaoke Singers

Dear Singer,

I know it's a particularly fun and entertaining pastime, and I admit that I sometimes enjoy a good karaoke session. But, please, consider your neighbors. It's okay to do this in the midday, or up to late afternoon, or even early evening. But it's not okay to do this late at night, and beyond midnight, nearing morning.

I wouldn't be so mad if you didn't suck so much. There are times it's okay to sing like there's nobody listening. Daybreak is not one of these times. If you really can't help it, sing somewhere soundproof, or at least in a place where the whole neighborhood couldn't hear you so loudly. Outside your house right in the main street is not a good place at those particular times. There are people trying to sleep, you ass. Your broken and ugly voice makes all the neighborhood dogs bark, if the noise your singing creates isn't enough to wake everyone up.

tl;dr: Do not videoke at daybreak, for sanity's sake.

Sincerely,

Restless Ranter,
Inggo

11.12.08

On Trinoma-SM North Jaywalkers

Dear Pedestrian,

Although I should probably reconsider calling you pedestrian, since you're more of a jaywalker. Anyway, you're probably aware that there's already a pedestrian overpass connecting SM North EDSA and Trinoma. What I would like to know is why you still prefer to cross the road rather than using it?

Yeah, you still have to climb a set of stairs, but you do have feet, now don't you? You wouldn't have been able to jaywalk otherwise. Also, when you choose to jaywalk, kindly do so swiftly. There's a lot of commuters being bothered by your simple strolling across a high-traffic road, causing delays to people a few kilometers away, barely missing a red light which could've saved them five minutes of their journey. It's not a park with sights anyway, and there's nothing beautiful to see, unless you consider a jammed-pack road of cars and exhaust aesthetically pleasing.

It's just a climbing set of stairs not only for your safety, but also for the convenience of thousands of commuters in their vehicles not being bothered by the traffic your jaywalking causes. What's so hard about that? Unless you're paralyzed or legless or injured you really don't have any justly reason jaywalking underneath a pedestrian overpass.

tl;dr: Use the overpass, shithead.

Sincerely,

Law-abiding pedestrian,
Inggo

P.S.
This letter is carbon-copied (CC) to other jaywalkers under a pedestrian overpass. Kindly rethink your ways and habits. Seriously.

6.12.08

On Twilight Fan(girl/boy)s, an Update

Dear Fan(girl/boy),

I still haven't read the book. But I have watched the film. Now I can safely say that Bolt was a better movie than Twilight. And, yes, I'm talking of a love-story perspective. I rate love stories based on how much "kilig" or, for a lack of a better term, butterflies in the stomach it produces when I watch it. It gave me none, nada, zilch. While Bolt didn't give me a lot, at least it gave me that warm fuzzy feeling, especially when they went and save Mittens.

I'm not saying that Twilight was a bad movie, it's just not good. I still cannot understand what you guys find in this film. It's pretty much sped up, with very little character development, which basically makes those who haven't read the book at lost. And what's ironic is that there's too much dialogue explaining about vampires, yet it's much simpler to understand that rather than understanding what each character is like.

What I did understand from the film is that Bella is lusty, and Edward is sparkly. Also, he and his father looks gay, and that's coming from a homophobe. And it's pretty much a prelude to the rest of the series. The plot twist was lame, with enemies emerging during a family ball game. Who the fuck spends a date with his family and on a baseball game?

Don't get me wrong, I don't dislike the film entirely. I kinda like Alice, even though there's a lack of development. I'm not really bashing the film. I'm just saying I've seen better, and there's too many to list them. Oh, and I still hate the fandom.

tl;dr: Twilight the movie sucks.

Sincerely,

Still a Twilight Fandom Hater,
Inggo

4.12.08

On "First" Commenters

Dear Commenter,

Congratulations, you're first. Too bad you didn't have anything constructive, critical, or informative to say. Now you look like an idiot who spends more time camping for videos or blog posts in the internet rather than doing or sharing something useful. Seriously, nobody but you cares if you were first, and unless there's a "first comment" contest somewhere I haven't heard about, I doubt what you're doing is anything good.

tl;dr: Hooray! You're first. Too bad nobody cares.

Sincerely,

"ZOMG FIRST POST!!!1!111onekthxbye" Hater,
Inggo

P.S.
To those "first" comment posters who missed, as well as "second", "third", and so on posters, I'm sorry. You're just as stupid as or even more stupid than the first guy.

2.12.08

On Twilight Fan(girl/boy)s

Dear Fan(girl/boy),

I haven't read the book. I haven't watched the movie. But were you really serious when you did this:
?

If you were... well... I'm sorry, but I seriously doubt you're getting him for Christmas.

Oh, and by the way, I understand the glitter, but what's that he's holding? A toothbrush? I guess make-believe vampires need to take care of their make-believe canines. Oh, wait. That was a candy cane. My bad.

Sincerely,

Twilight Fan(girl/boy) Hater,
Inggo

1.12.08

On "No Life" Commenters

Dear Commenter,

Before you even consider posting "no life" on rhythm game Tatsujin videos on YouTube, please click the "Audio Preview" button and do not even consider clicking the other one. Seriously, though, if you spent the time and effort to comment that, wouldn't that make you the one without a life? To think at least they have done something great, while you just sit there, post ad hominem against them without considering yourself. You don't even know what they've done in their lives. Some of these people actually earn more than professionals just by playing these games.

So what if you're a professional, university graduate, master, whatever. Posting such comments on an internet video makes you the one without a life. If you have nothing good to say, especially against something great, don't say it. Or maybe you're just jealous of the skill they possess, and that you're stuck in your own crappy life which allows no time for you to develop these skills and instead resorts to no other option but to watch videos on YouTube and post such ludicrous comments?

Too bad, then. If you have time to watch YouTube, you'd best spend it on getting a better life.

tl;dr: Keep your "no life" comments to yourself.

Sincerely,

Professional Ranter Extraordinaire,
Inggo

On Wannabe Pros

Dear Someone,

I'll keep this short, and it's a good thing too... to divert from my seemingly all-train related posts.

Don't talk professional crap on something you're not really a professional of. Prove yourself before you impose on other people your "professionalism". That is all.

Sincerely,

Professional Ranter,
Inggo